Baby Jackson's Blog

Marilyn:

Jackson was born on Sunday October 4th at 2:00 p.m, weighing 2 lbs 3 oz. Right as the last session of conference was starting.

At 20 weeks to prevent me from losing the baby, Dr. Allen did surgery to sow my cervix shut. I was then put on bedrest for the rest of my pregnancy. I was only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom. My friend Joann Davis and many others put together a schedule to provide someone to always be at my house while David was at work. I felt so blessed with all the ones who helped my family while I was on bedrest. The house was always kept clean, the laundry was done, the kids were entertained and meals were prepared. I thank Heavenly Father every night for the ones who have helped our family.

On Wednesday I called the doctor with some concerns. They had me come in that day to do an ultra sound. Everything looked normal and I was sent home for my bedrest. Then that night I had contractions for 3 hours. I didn't go to the doctors because they stopped and I assumed they were Braxton Hicks. Then Thursday night October 1st at midnight again, I had contractions. But this time I knew they were serious and after 2 hours we headed to the hospital.

I was given medication to stop the contractions. The medicine was the worst thing I had every experienced. It was hard to breath, I felt like I was having a heart attack and it made me very nauseated. Around 10:00 a.m. on Friday they finally stopped. They wanted to monitor me for a few days to make sure I didn't go into labor again. My water never broke and my cervix was still shut. The doctors decided to hold off sending me to Boise where if I did have a 25 weeker, they could handle the care of the baby. I was given two shots of steroids to help the babies lungs in case I went into labor. I was given Demerol for the pain and I was very greatful for it. It is my favorite drug when in labor.

Then early Sunday morning I started bleeding again and having contractions. I was given more drugs to stop the contractions. My body did not handle the drugs too well, I was vomiting and having trouble breathing. I was put on oxygen and sent to Boise on a plane.

As I was being carried onto the stretcher to the ambulance, I saw that it was snowing. I was flown on a plane to the Boise airport. Heavenly Father was blessing me so much during the flight. I felt very calm and His arms surrounding with His love. I kept thinking, "wow how can I be so calm right now." I was in completely amazed and thankful for how well the medical team transported me. They were so kind to me and did a great job.

When I arrived at the hospital again I was given drugs again to stop the contractions. My blood pressure was getting seriously low. The doctor decided to test my amniotic fluid for an infection. Sure enough, I had 2 infections in my fluid. I was then prepped for a c-section. The doctor told me the baby was very sick and that there was a chance that he may not live. With a prayer in my heart I still continued to fill comforted by my Heavenly Father.

After they gave me the spinal, the doctor started cutting. I started screaming that I could feel it. It was a very scary feeling. They had to wait an extra 10 minutes before they could do the surgery. I've had 2 c-sections before and this was the only one that I felt so aware of what was going on. It was a long surgery, they doctor said because the baby was so small, it would be difficult to get him out and that they may have to cut both directions. But thankfully they didn't have to.

After they pulled the baby out, I could feel him leave me and I felt very sad. David was there with me to tell me that he was born right at 2:00 p.m.

After the surgery the doctor kept saying that I might have internal bleeding and that they may have to cut me open again. My body wasn't doing well. My blood pressure was extremely low, my oxygen wasn't good and other symptoms were occuring that had the doctors concerned. I prayed and prayed that my body would recover and that I would not have to go under the knive again.

Finally I was sent back to my room after 3 hours. I was monitored very closely that night. They did my vitals every 45 minutes. I was in bad shape, with low BP and low oxygen and a stomach full of gas. I was put on oxygen and antibiotics for the infections.

I was blessed to have such wonderful nurses and an intern that checked on me constantly telling me she was worried about me.

My mind is still blurry with everything that happened in the hospital. My mom came on Tuesday and stayed with me until I was released on Thursday October 9th. It was fun having her there with me. She was a great help!

On Wednesday the doctor came to see me and recommened that I have a blood transfusion. I was so pale and week and they thought I could benefit from one. My count was at a 22 and the normal is 32. I told them I wanted to wait until the next day to make that decision.

But by Thursday I felt a little better and the doctor thought I would do fine without one.

It was very hard to go and see Jackson for the first time. I would much rather trade him places, be on bed rest and not have him be going through all this and having pain. It just broke my heart to see how little he was. But I knew that he was a special spirit that needed to come to this earth, even under such hard circumstances. I knew Heavenly Father and His angels were watching over him and protecting him. I feel blessed to be able to be his mom. It will be a long road, but we will get through it because we have so much support from our ward, family and friends. My faith will continue to be tested and my testimony in God will be strengthened.

I was so excited to come home and see my boys. I tried hard not to look back at the hospital as we left the parking lot. Of course I did and felt very sad to leave him there all by himself.

When I came to the front door of my house, Brady opened the door and gave me an immediate hug. James and Bryan followed behind and gave me a gentle hug. I was so happy to see them. Brady wanted to read me books, he pulled out all his school books and read to me like crazy. James was chattering non stop about all the things he had been doing and about who he was playing with while I was gone. Bryan kept saying, "baby at the hospital."

Bryan has been staying right by my side nonstop since I have been home. He constantly comes up and give me hugs. He's such a sweetie. It's hard to imagine that he was born at 29 weeks and we went through the same thing, except he was in the Twin Falls NICU.

I realized even more how important our families are. That I just need to let the little things go and throw out the schedule at times and just sit and enjoy my children without thinking about the next task of the day. I've been enjoying listening to Brady and James chatter to me about everything that is on their minds.

I have a great husband who is my rock. He was so calm in the hospital and gave me much strength to endure all this.

I'm leaving tomorrow for Boise, I'm excited but torn to leave my three little boys. I will miss them so much. Thanks again to all of you for your prayers, support and service. Wish me luck!